Punk, Emo, Goth, and Skinhead Jokes....
A punk and a skin are in the backseat of a car, who's driving?
A cop..

How many goths does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
100...One to change it, one to break it, and 98 to cut they're wrists on the pieces of broken glass..

How many emo people does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
2...One to change it and one to pass out lyrics..

How many skaters does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
2...One to change it and one to film it..

How do you get a punk out of a bath tub?
Turn the water on..

How many punks does it take to change a lightbulb?
4...One to change it, one to kick the chair, one to say how punk that was, and one to say "Shut up Mike!!"

What do you call a skin at the bottom of the ocean?
A good start..

How do you get a one armed punk out of a tree?
Throw him a beer..

What do you call a punk without a girl friend?
Homeless..

Three drunked skins jump off a building. One skin had been drinking Guinness, the second Fosters, and the third Blatz. Which one hits the ground first?
Who the hell cares??!!

How many straight-edgers does it take to drink a case of beer?
One, if no ones looking..

What's the difference between a cop car and a porcupine?
A porcupine has pricks on the outside.

How many staight-edgers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
None, they don't screw..

What is the difference between a fascist and a trampoline?
You take your boots off before jumping on a trampoline..

Why are cops buried 12 feet down when they die, instead of the normal 6 feet?
Because deep down they're all really good people..

An apartment building in California has skins living on the first floor, punks on the second floor, and hippies on the third floor. One day a big fired burns the building to the ground. Who survived?
The skins. They were at work..

What do you call a bunch of racist skinheads atthe bottom of the ocean?
A good start..

How many goths does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
None, they'd rather light candles..

A young punker gets on the cross-town bus. He's got spiked, multicolored hair, that's green, purple, and orange. His clothes are all a tattered mix of leather and rags. His legs are bare and he's without shoes. HIs entire face and bod yare riddled with piercing and his earrings are big, bright feathers. He sits down in the only vacant seat, directly across from an old man who just glares at him for the next ten miles. Finally, the punk gets self conscious and barks at the old man, "What are you looking at you old fart? Didn't you ever do anything wild when you were young?" With missing a beat, the old man replies, "Yeah! Back when I was a young and in the Navy, I got really drunk one night in Singapore and I fucked a parrot. I thought maybe you were my son."

How can you tell a genuine punk band from a bunch of poseurs?
the poseurs remember to bring their instruments..

Punk Definition of True Love-
When a punk gets down on his knees, holds your hand, looks into your eyes, and asks if he can sleep at your place tonight...

How many emo kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
None!! Let them cry in the dark..

A punk and a "normal" guy are walking down the street one day. The punk is in classic form; six inch blue liberty spikes, plaid bondage pants, leather jacket with band names scribbled all over it, etc. The normal guy turns to the punk and asks, "So just exactly waht is punk anyway?" The punk emphatically relies, "Man, punk is doing whatever you want, whenever you want to and not giving a shit about what anybody else things...You see that trash can right there?" The punk walks over to the nearby trash can and kicks it over, spilling garbage all over the sidewalk. "That's punk." The normal guy ponder this as they continue to walk down the sidewalk. The next trash can they come to, the normal guy steps up to it and gives it a kick, sending garbage flying everywhere. He turns to the punk, "So that's punk, huh?" The punk replies, "No that's trendy.."

Dead Baby Jokes....YAY!!!
What is red and pink and can't turn round in a corridor?
A baby with a javelin through its throat.

What is more disgusting than a pile of 100 dead babies?
One live one in the middle is eating its way out.

What's blue and sits in the corner?
A baby in a baggie.

What's present do you get for a dead baby?
A dead puppy.

What's purple, covered in puss and squeals?
A peeled baby in a bag of salt.

What sits in the kitchen and keeps getting smaller and smaller?
A baby combing it's hair with a potato peeler!

What's pink and red and silver and crawls into walls?
A baby with forks in its eyes.

Why did the baby cross the road?
It was stapled to the chicken.

What do you get when you cut a baby with a straight razor?
An erection.

Why did the baby fall off the swing?
Because it had no arms or legs.

What's got four wheels, smokes and squeals?
A bus load of babies on fire.

What's harder to do than nailing a baby to a tree?
Nailing it to a dead puppy.

What's grosser than ten dead babies nailed to a tree?
One dead baby nailed to ten trees.

What's pink and chunky?
A baby with leporacy.

Why do babies have a soft spot in their heads?
So you can pick them up five at a time.

How many dead babies does it take to screw in a light bulb?
As many as it takes to climb on top of them in order to reach the socket.

What's pink and spits?
A baby in a frying pan.

What's worse than finding a dead baby on your pillow in the morning?
Realizing you were drunk and made love to it the night before.

What's more fun than a barrel of dead babies?
Sticking pins in their eyes.

How do you make a baby cry twice?
Wipe your bloody cock on his teddy bear.

What's the best sound in the world?
Hearing dead baby's hips crack under pressure!

What wiggles spits and is covered in shit?
inside out baby!

What's blue and orange and lies at the bottom of a swimming pool?
A baby with burst armbands.

How do you make a dead baby float?
Two scoops of ice cream, one scoop of dead baby.

Whats worse than a having sex with a dead baby?
Having sex with a dead baby filled with razor blades.

What's 18 inches long and makes women scream all night?
Crib death.

Why is there always hot water at childbirth?
In case of a stillbirth, soup.

How do you stop a baby from choking?
Take your dick out of its mouth.

What's red, bubbly, and scratches at the window before exploding?
A baby in a microwave.

When is the best time to bury that baby you killed?
When it starts talking to you again.

How many babies does it take to make a bottle of baby oil?
It depends on how hard you squeeze them.

What's more fun than stapling babies to a wall?
Ripping them off again.

What do you call a dead baby with its skin peeled off?
Sexy.

What's funnier than a dead baby?
A dead baby in a clown costume!

What's blue and flies around the room at high speeds?
A baby with a punctured lung.

What do you call a dead baby pinned to your wall?
Art!

How do you get 100 babies into a bucket?
With a blender!

How do you get them out again?
With Doritos!!

What is pink and red and sits in a corner?
A baby chewing on razor blades.

What is green and sits in a corner?
The same baby, six weeks later.